• Monica

5 Easy Ways I Teach My Daughter Self Love





Teaching a four year how to love themselves was not in any of my reading material when I was pregnant. I didn't come across the blog post that gave me tips and tricks on how to teach self love. And I definitely didn't hear the topic thrown around amongst other moms.


So here I am looking at a beautiful little black girl getting ready to tell her what I know about self love and I'm scared.

Yep thats right I'm scared. Why? Well because to be 100% honest it wasn't until a few years ago that I actually started loving my own self. I mean really loving who I was and I still struggle some days. Sooooo having this conversation with a four year scares because what if she still goes through life and not realize how amazing she is until she is 24? Thats 20 years of self doubt, low self esteem, not walking with confidence, not looking in the mirror and thinking your beautiful. I don't want that for her.

So what did i do? I put on my girl panties and looked her in the eye and told her she was beautiful. But I didn't stop there. Why? Because I have to remind her every chance I get that she is amazing and this is how I do it.




1. Compliment her outfit and hair every morning. I want her walking into her preschool with her head high and full of confidence. I want her to know that she is putting out her best self everyday.

2. Remind Brandon to compliment her as well. I want her early male interactions to be filled with positivity, love and respect. So she knows that is what she deserves in this world.

3. Allow her to engage in activities that make her feel like her best self. She is obsessed with art....so I want to create environments that allow her to build her confidence in something that she loves doing.

4. Model self love. This one is hard... I must admit... but I try to show her that I love myself as much as I can and be careful with the language I use.

5. Practice affirmations of self love. We don't do this often but every now and then when she thinks her outfit isn't cute, or she doesn't like the way her hair looks. I take her in the mirror with me and we repeat these affirmations.

I am beautiful
I love my hair
I am pretty
I love my skin
I love me

Does she feel a little silly doing it...of course she is 4.. but I'm hoping that these words will stick with so that whenever she needs them they are right there.


This part of motherhood wasn't something I ever thought about it but its something that is sooooo important. If I don't build confidence and self love in her this world will crush her. And I refuse to allow that to happen. Protect your babies, love them up, tell them everyday they are amazing, they need it more than you know. They are the future.



© 2018 by Bymonicajones

  • Black Facebook Icon
  • Black YouTube Icon
  • Black Instagram Icon
  • Black Pinterest Icon